In a move that shocked communists all over America, NPR signed Karl Rove to a three year contract Friday. Rove will provide analysis and commentary on such popular NPR shows as…

I contacted NPR President Vivian Schiller, and she had this to say about the Rove hiring:

You know, five years ago I wanted that man taken out of the White House in handcuffs. But did you see how he tore apart Christine O’Donnell? I mean wow! His anger was so delicious that it had to be fattening.

The irrational hate Rove spewed after that witch won the Delaware primary, it showed me that he was NPR material.

Diane Rehm, of NPR ‘s The Diane Rehm Show likes the idea of Rove joining the NPR family:

You know, five years ago I wanted that man taken out of the White House in handcuffs. But did you see what he had to say about that idiot Sarah Palin? (Rove recently said in an interview that Palin doesn’t have what it takes to be President.)

The comments he made about that hayseed moron demonstrated the kind of journalistic integrity that fits NPR’s code of ethics… or something.

I was able to track down Mr. Rove. When I asked him about his new NPR contract he said:

Who the hell are you and how did you get in my garage?!?

I will continue to follow this story until I need a nap.*

*Warning, a portion or all of this story is complete b.s.

This book is going to be a page turner. Karl Rove has given some great interviews in the last week. He sat down with John Hawkins of Right Wing News recently. John asked Rove about the communication strategy in the White House during the Bush years.

One of the things that has puzzled conservatives about the Bush presidency, particularly in the second term — and I’ve heard this again and again and again — is they don’t feel like there was an effective communication strategy. The general feeling was that the Left turned George Bush into a punching bag and just beat him into the ground, while the White House really didn’t do much to stop it. Can you talk about that a little bit?

Well, I do think that there are instances, particularly on the issue of Iraq’s WMDs, where the administration didn’t punch back hard enough. I talk about that at length in the book.

It’s principally my responsibility because I should have seen it for what it was, which was a corrosive dagger aimed at the heart of the Bush Administration. But I would say this: in the last two years of the term, Bush was on the receiving end of daily blows from every Democratic presidential candidate and it was impossible for me to respond to those. The Republicans were disorganized, distressed, and didn’t come to his aid while others said the President can defend himself.

But when you’re receiving daily blows like that, you can either do your job or defend yourself, but you can’t do both every single day. It’s just the way life works.

To read the entire interview, click here.