I don’t wish what my mother has been through the last two weeks on anyone. It has been hell: Intense chemotherapy, four days in the oncology ward, emergency rooms, the ICU and now the cardiac ward. She has been poked and prodded, had blood tests, X-Rays, MRI’s and has about five tubes in her arm.
Mom is still fighting the two infections that put her back in the hospital five days ago. Doctors have also discovered a grape sized tumor in her heart (lymphoma) that they hope will shrink as a result of her chemotherapy. The last sixteen days have been a roller coaster ride of emotions. They have been both depressing and inspirational.
This latest episode started with her trip to the cancer center here in Ann Arbor a little over two weeks ago. That was an intense chemotherapy session–the last treatment took twenty four hours to complete. She got through that session like a champ–and was released from the hospital after just four days.
If you ever want a sobering experience, take a five minute walk through a cancer center.
What I have seen in oncology are things that I will never forget. For me the one thing that really sticks out–was seeing children that were bald, as young as five years old, laughing and playing in the waiting room. Witnessing that scene ripped my heart out and made me smile all at the same time.
After a five day stay at home we realized something was wrong with mom, so we rushed her to the local ER. After getting her stable, the hospital staff made the decision to transport her to Ann Arbor (90 miles from home).
She spent six hours in the ER in Ann Arbor. Patients were separated by curtains and there was little privacy. It was packed, but there were two men that were in a lot of pain. One man fell off a ladder, and I could hear him arguing with the hospital staff, certain that he was neither in Ann Arbor or in the hospital.
I stepped out to make a phone call when paramedics brought in another man on a stretcher. He looked like he was the victim of a pretty bad car accident. He had dreadful head wounds and had what looked like a tube down his throat. His eyes were slightly open but were rolled up into his head. The ER crew whisked him away and I never saw him again.
The ER staff had to get mom’s resting heart rate down–while trying to get her blood pressure up. It was a difficult task. In addition, they discovered a terrible infection that needed to be treated. After they got her condition stabilized (six hours later), they transferred her to the ICU.
When it comes to depressing places, if there is a place that rivals the cancer center it is the ICU. The ICU staff got mom’s heart rate and blood pressure stabilized. They also discovered that she has E. coli, and started pumping her with five different antibiotics. One of the side effects of chemotherapy is that it attacks the patient’s white blood cells, which inhibits the body from fighting infection on its own.
On many occasions I had to go into the waiting room while the nursing staff had to perform routine procedures on my mom. There was one family that was a fixture in the waiting room and, I could tell that things were not going their way. When they were there, you could cut the emotion in that room with a knife.
The last day my mom was in ICU there must have been fifteen family members and friends of that patient in the waiting room…crying. Right before I said goodbye to my mother (I had to go back to Indy), I glanced down the hall two rooms down where all fifteen people were crammed into the patient’s room. Many were crying. My heart ached for them.
I returned to Ann Arbor three days later after they transferred my mom out of ICU and into the cardiac ward. Speculation of a tumor in her heart was confirmed by an MRI. As of now she still has E. coli (and one other infection), her white cell count is still low, her heart is strong but beating irregularly, she hasn’t eaten a meal in 9 days and she is weak. But… she is still with us. We are truly thankful.
Of my experience the last 16 days (which matters little compared to that of my mom’s) I can say the following:
- The staff at this hospital is truly amazing. Most of the doctors and nurses here are so young (under 40). I am amazed at their professionalism, kindness and energy. God bless them all.
- The support that my mom and my family has received from the online community has been overwhelming, comforting and stunning. The response to my prayer request blog post, as well as all the tweets and Facebook posts we have received have been simply unbelievable. Words can not express how much you all have meant to my family and we will never forget it.
- There are images in my head I will always remember; the small children with cancer, the man in the ER who was in the car wreck…and that poor family in the ICU are forever in my memory. God bless them all.
This hospital is a microcosm of what is best about humanity: People with kindness in their hearts helping out folks that really need it most. I have seen it in hospital staff, in family, friends and complete strangers. Everyone here has treated the sick with grace, dignity and respect.
What I have witnessed here the last two weeks has been awe inspiring.
And once my mother is out of here I hope to never see it again.
