This is from The Detroit Free Press. Of the Massa/Beck interview;

Massa, who resigned hours earlier as a Democratic Congressman from New York amid allegations of sexual harassment, admitted on the conservative talking head’s program that he had groped a male staffer.

“Now they’re saying I groped a male staffer,” Massa said. “Yeah, I did. Not only did I grope him, I tickled him until he couldn’t breathe and four guys jumped on top of me. It was my 50th birthday, and it was kill the old guy.”

Everyone here at The Snark Factor feels a little gay after hearing his explanation. Truth be told, I don’t care if he’s gay, if you’re gay or if Ringo Starr is gay. But it is obvious that Massa cares what you think.

So the Snark Factor has come up with six other cover stories that Massa can use to cover up his male groping. Not that he needs any, I’m sure that everyone believed the explanation he came up with for Beck.

1. Yeah I groped them, but we were playing Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board.

2. Sure I touched em, but it was my birthday and we were playing Truth or Dare. I said “dare.”

3. Yes I goosed him, but we were taking a tour of the Neverland Ranch and I got carried away.

4. Yes we may have had inappropriate contact, but we were recreating our favorite scenes from the Broadway hit “Grease.”

5. Sure I was playing grab ass, but in my defense I am a “Grab Ass Adict” (The Tiger Woods Defense.)

6. I’m Gay (or at least a little gay.)

I say use #6 Congressman, it’s okay to tell the truth…

Nevada made news today with tea party activists denouncing a 3rd party bid to oust Senator Reid. So today I pose this question:

Conservative columnist Jedediah Bila joins the fun as The Snark Factor turns 1 year old. Also, Molly Teichman, Michelle Moore, Thomas LaDuke and Melanie Hall help celebrate this momentous occasion!

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Rep. Eric Massa was on Glenn Beck’s TV show today and made even more wild accusations regarding White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel’s recent behavior. Nobody at The Snark Factor was watching, but we believe these were the 6 most shocking statements made during the Glenn Beck show by Rep. Massa.

1. Rahm taped the 2008 World Series without the express written consent of Major League Baseball.

2. Emanuel kidnapped the Lindbergh baby.

3. Rahm hid the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.

4. Emanuel has a tramp stamp tattoo of Nancy Pelosi’s face (Massa saw it in the shower.)

5. Rahm is the President of the Mr. Belvedere fan club.

6. Emanuel owns every Spice Girls CD and once called the group “the voice of my generation.”

Serious allegations; some of which may call for a special prosecutor. I will investigate the accuracy of these charges until I take a nap.

A preview of the one year anniversary of The Snark Factor! Molly Teichman of Political Mommentary and Mommentator and the Mohawk discusses what The Snark Factor has meant to her, conservatism and humanity.

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I will let Real Clear Politics set this up.

“Rahm Emanuel is son of the devil’s spawn, Rep. Eric Massa (D-NY) said. “He is an individual who would sell his mother to get a vote. He would strap his children to the front end of a steam locomotive.”

Rep. Massa describes a confrontation with Emanuel in a shower: “I am showering, naked as a jaybird, and here comes Rahm Emanuel, not even with a towel wrapped around his tush, poking his finger in my chest, yelling at me.”

This is not the first time Rahm has appeared naked somewhere to yell obsentities at some unsuspecting rube. Luckily The Snark Factor has compiled a list of six other occasions when Emanuel came unglued in the buff.

1. In 1994, a then naked Rahm Emanuel attacked Nancy Kerrigan with a crowbar, hitting her in the knee. Jeff Gillooly, who was later charged with the crime was heard by the New York Times to say “I’m just a patsy.”

2. Naked Emanuel was seen running from the grassy knoll of Dealey Plaza on November 22, 1963. Oliver Stone documents this in his Sequal to JFK; Kennedy II, The Wrath of Kahn.

3. Cheeky Rahm was the real driver of O.J.’s Ford Bronco. He jumped from the vehicle and AC Cowlings took the wheel after Rahm spotted a GAP outlet store.

4. Randy Rahm was spotted beating Reginald Denny during the LA riots in 1992. To be fair, he was wearing a towel this time.

5. In 2009, Naked Rahm was spotted beating three teenage girls outside of the Staples Center in Los Angeles, before leaving the scene with 3 Jonas Bothers Concert tickets.

6. Randy Rahm ripped Janet Jackson’s shirt during the Super Bowl XXVIII Halftime show. CBS claimed that both Janet’s shirt ripping and Rahm not wearing a towel were ” wardrobe malfunctions.”

Kathy Griffin went up to Alaska to make fun of Sarah Palin. We will be ripping Kathy a new one here soon, but until then I ask you:

* Adding Mitt Romney was my little joke. Meghan McCain is everyone’s litt…

Yeah she’s a joke too…

The Snark Factor will turn one tomorrow! This is a preview of tomorrow’s show, a clip of an interview with conservative columnist Jedediah Bila. Check out Jedediah’s columns at Human Events, The Daily Caller, AMAC or at her website.

Remember, there is a new date and time for The Snark Factor. Join me tomorrow night at 9PM EST, only on Radioforconservatives.com.

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Will Ferrell does his best Harry Caray

H/T MMorgan73